How to support the women in your life


Two women sharing a laugh and a joke

Published March 2025  
Expert contributor Dr Sonia Davison, Endocrinologist, Jean Hailes for Women’s Health  
Words by Carrie Hutchinson


At different times in their lives, women go through hormonal upheavals: as their period approaches, while they’re pregnant and as they come to the end of their reproductive years. 

Here’s what’s going on during those times and how you can be more supportive.

Understanding a woman’s body

To be able to help and support the women in your life, you need to know what’s going on with her body. So, here’s a little refresher on the major hormonal changes most women experience.

Menstrual cycle

The menstrual cycle is the body’s prep for falling pregnant. When a woman doesn’t become pregnant, she loses the uterus lining during her period. For a week or so before this happens, women can experience premenstrual syndrome (often called PMS). 

Some women have no symptoms during PMS. Others experience different emotional and physical symptoms, like cramping, bloating, breast tenderness, headaches, cravings, mood changes, irritability, anxiety and sadness.

In Australia, girls start their period around the age of 13 and, on average, stop when they’re around 50 years old. There are also certain conditions, like endometriosis and polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS) which can affect periods. 

Pregnancy

When a woman becomes pregnant, she experiences sudden increases in certain hormones, including oestrogen and progesterone. These imbalances can cause anxiety, irritability and mood swings, as well as fatigue, bloating and skin pigmentation. 

There are also other changes to the body you may not notice as it prepares for a baby. There are many great online resources around if you need some advice.

Perimenopause and menopause

Perimenopause is the stage in a woman’s life leading up to her final period. When she hasn’t had a period for 12 months, she’s reached menopause. 

Perimenopause usually begins in a woman’s 40s and generally lasts between four and six years. During that time, the ovaries run out of eggs, causing hormonal fluctuations. 

Physical symptoms often include hot flushes and night sweats, joint pain, brain fog, sleep issues, her periods can become lighter, heavier or irregular, and changes in mood can be dramatic. Women can also be very emotional about their childbearing years coming to an end. Even once her periods have stopped, a woman can still have symptoms for years. 

What to do when she’s upset

If the woman (or women) you know are experiencing some of these symptoms, your go-to move might be to head to the gym, the pub or maybe the garage. But that’s not always the best solution. 

Knowing how to give your partner (or sister or friend) the support she needs can make both of your lives better, says Dr Sonia Davison from Jean Hailes for Women’s Health.

“It's important to be calm, kind and considerate, non-judgemental and supportive,” says Dr Davison. “Ask them if they need anything, if anything is worrying them and if you can be of assistance. It’s about wanting to help the person in front of you, who may be experiencing changes that can affect their mood.” 

Sometimes it’s a matter of sussing out whether a woman needs to vent or if she would prefer to be left alone.

“Give her some space and time to work things through,” Dr Davison says. “Don’t force anything. There may not be a right or wrong thing to say depending on their circumstances.”

Here are three ways you can help when you sense a woman is upset.

  1. Offer support: “Understand there are factors involved that aren’t easily controlled,” says Dr Davison. “Then reach out … offer calm support and ask how you might help.”
  2. Try active listening: Focus on the person, make eye contact and nod to show you’re listening. Then actually listen, without offering up any solutions.  
  3. Ask questions: This can really improve communication with your partner but try not to be judgmental. (This applies every day not just when they’re ‘moody’.) Listening without judgment is a great way to create trust. 

Some practical ways you can help

The constant burden of planning, organising and being responsible for a household also often falls on women’s shoulders. This mental load can be exhausting and eventually impact mental health, particularly if they’re also dealing with a hormonal storm. 

One helpful move is to ask her how you can help. Offering support is always helpful, says Dr Davison. But it’s often more effective to take initiative. 

“[If you] see and attend to jobs that need doing, you’ll help lighten her load,” she adds.

Here are some ways to show you’re taking the lead:

  • Bring her coffee or plan a lunch date.
  • Send her a message to tell her you’re thinking of her.
  • Load of washing finished? Hang it out.
  • Tidy up clutter, including in the kids' rooms and garden.
  • Walk the dog, or be in charge of flea treatment.
  • Make sure house maintenance is up to date.
  • Take the kids out for the day to give her some time alone.
  • Be there for her. Sit on the couch, watch a movie and be present. 

Try out these tips to see what works best for the women in your life, but don’t forget, says Dr Davison, sometimes what’s really needed is “an enormous hug”. Don’t underestimate how powerful that can be. 

Looking after your mental health

Because we’ve been helping hardworking Aussies look after their health for over 135 years, we know everyone’s mental health journey is different. And often finding support can be challenging. That’s why we’re now working on a range of mental health support programs to help you, and your loved ones, to get the support you need. 


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